All in the ass-end of the day

We saddled half the horses we caught, to save trouble by the end of the day - if only we knew what kind of end day we'd have!

It was a Monday, and with no cruise ship rides I expected it to be a bit slower. I didn't expect to be SO slow. With not one ride booked for the day, J and I were confined to the daily chores at an agonisingly slow pace, just to kill time. I think at one point I even fell asleep in the tack room.

At lunchtime, I took the opportunity - since the net still wasn't working properly - to go bareback riding into the water, hopefully with some swimming involved this time. I chose Prince, a 4-year-old cheeky bastard who'd knocked up the horse who'd just had her foal before he was castrated, as I'd always wanted to ride him. He looked comfortable enuf, wasn't as comfortable in reality but does love the water so was no problems getting him in.

It is much harder to get them to swim in the ocean as you need them to go deep deep to let yourself float above them, but to do that you need control of the reins to guide them out there. And he kept trying to go back in, cos all his friends were up at the stable. I secretly think he hated me for it.

Regardless, I got pretty wet and J took some good photos so I was happy. Then Tom, with his abscice in the foot, needed attending to so I took him walking in the water, me on foot. Well, sometimes... I fell over a couple of times in there and ruined all chances of keeping my t-shirt dry (which I'd taken off for the ride with Prince). Came up dripping with water and sand to show the boss his foot, he wondered what the hell I'd been up to in there.

The afternoon was where it really started to get entertaining. I noticed one horse getting all colic-like on me, doing some weird shit and trying to lie down all the time, so we called the boss who was off-site at the time, and he said I needed to give him a shot so there I was again - Romania Pt. II - jabbing a needle, untrained, unknowing, unwise, into the neck of some poor animal. Anyway, it seemed to work and shazam, he was better! Phew.

Unfortunately, this all happened about the same time as the

Noticed something weird today... I have 2 scabs on my hands just like stigmata. Weird because I was just reading about stigmata in the Bob Marley bio L lent me, and now I have managed to get 2 marks on my hands just like it! Ha! Won't read TOO much into that.........

So we were about to feed all the horses and be out right on time, when I hear the walky-talky call. "Guides, come in. Guides, come in." Shit. What now? "I have a ride for you, 6 people, 4 - 5pm." OK. So we need to have 6 horses, and I need to saddle my horse. "Oh, sorry, also R wants you to work tomorrow and have Thursday off instead." OK... did have some plans but I guess they'll have to wait...

First, I was actually not put on the ride because she thought I'd want to rest for my big day on the next day. Hell no, I want to ride and I want to make tips!! So J kindly told the office manager he needed to milk the cow so I should take the ride. Next thing we know, "Guides, come in. Guides, come in." Yes????? "I have another ride for you, 4 people, 5 - 6pm." Are you serious?? Fuck's sake.

So I took the first ride out. Turned out to be 6 NY adolescents, I guess they were 18, half of which had never been horseriding before. Man, they were annoying. I found myself saying, before the ride even started, "OK, so what I'd like is no screaming. That will get you nowhere. Also, if you remember the simple instruction about how to stop the horse - yes, that's right, just pull back - then we are on the same page. You are controlling the horse, no one else."

But I tell you what, they were hard work. Actually got a little better towards the end, and I think they even enjoyed themselves, but when the still-working father of someone came back to pick them up, in between checking his Blackberry and trying to say thanks (it was hard for him to concentrate on me) I thought I'd get no tip. I actually walked away before he called me back to give me a 20. How about 100??? I wanted to yell. But I smiled sweetly and said thank you.

But the day was not over yet. I had a pony ride for the little girl too young to join her sister and dad on the ride J took out. Actually, I ended up getting a $5 tip from that, so that was something, at least! Pony rides don't usually get tips.

Had to go back up to the horses and unsaddle and prepare to feed for when J returned. Except that I lost my horse. I'd tied none of them up when I walked the Terrible Turds down, and all but my horse was in the rack, of course. Found him looking over the pen that Black Beauty and her foal - now named Pimienta (meaning Pepper, as that's the colour I think she'll end up) - that all the horses are wildly fascinated with. One horse, Tornado, honestly thinks he's the dad. The actual father, Prince, is not at all interested in her. Bad daddy.

And so it was that I didn't finish until just before 7pm. Cannot believe it. After such a non-eventful day - 7pm!!! Geeeeez. At least I got some tips and went out for a ride. But I mostly remember today for my injuries. I slammed my finger in the gate and scratched myself a few times - but the biggie came on my ride, when Prince bit me in the water. Maybe he was going for Chico, maybe he was pissed off at me making him swim earlier in the day... whatever it was, it fucking hurt. One of the screaming girls reacted by laughing hysterically at my injury. Yep. Real. Fucking. Funny.

It's already welting up.