Enter Exit, Enter Drunken Poms

It's been a while between blog drinks for me, and as unlikely as I would have pinned it to be, I am actually pre-writing this little puppy in my own 6 bed sleeper carriage on the way to Brasov in Romania. Which has AC, an electronics plug and oh yeah, did I mention NO ONE else in it??? Super, super sweet.

So I've just left Budapest from Exit festival in Serbia, having come back for one night in Budapest to gather the things C so kindly let me store at his house. Geez, I could NOT imagine trekking to Exit with all that shit. Worst backpacker ever. Not the only time I'll say that.

Exit festival... what an experience! I met my coach at Ferighay airport in Budapest and it was at that point I realised just how many Poms I'd be surrounded with. God give me strength. Six hours into the ride to Serbia and they're already whining they need the toilet, they need a cigarette, they need some weed, they need a drink - they need a steaming hot glass of shut the hell up, is what they need. At board control, my passport is the only non-EU one and it gets queried like I'm some friend from across the waters with three arms and four legs. It furthers holds up our coach. The Poms still aren't happy. Surprise.

Anyway, after so many unhappy thoughts clouded my mind for these few, uh, interesting hours on the bus, I ended up making friends with the loveliest couple of Brits who were even more clueless than me when we got dropped off not at the actual festival but the local town. The bus driver clearly not interested and not trained in one word of English, tells us all to clear off (to be fair, he wasn't a prick, he was actually the most entertaining one on the bus as he jollily sang along to his favourite Serbian tunes) and we were stuck looking around for the nearest sign, bank, cab or, for some, pub.

I took initiative - this couple was already treating me like I knew what I was doing - and while everyone clambered around trying to order or hail cabs, I spotted a man wearing an Exit-ish lanyard and got the thumbs-up from him to get a free lift to the camping ground. Turns out he's run the Chinese food stall for the last four years. Champion.

So we were in. I pitched my £10 Tesco tent (bargain) in the couple's group of friends - all happy-go-lucky young'uns from north of London - and we had a wander around. That night and the following night only the camping ground - Exit Village - was open but it was a great start to the (almost) week in the vicinity. People immediately started bonding and almost everyone was in great spirits and not yet twatting it up. I say almost everyone because at one point, while I danced past some guys I'd met in Budapest before, one decided it would be super fun to spit his drink on me, then as he was about to try again, I grabbed his friend's drink and threw it on him. No doubt he thought that was a rather amusing thing to do. I wasn't quite so happy. So you'll notice in some of my photos I have massive drink spillage on my yellow top. Yeah, not my fault. I henceforth actively discouraged any of my camp from associated with them and when we bought a paddling pool from town, forbid them from entering it.

At one point I went with my Brit friends to the local beach which had a great social area to chill out in. The most beautiful part of it, however, was the people. My GOSH Serbian girls are hot!! I even snuck a couple of pics of the greatest ass I have ever seen. I think they were all students on break. I'd like to teach them a thing or two eh eh. We also went into town for dinner and to check out the local nightlife, which was great since Exit was on. I made friends with the 2nd cutest dog (after Angie of course) I've even seen. There are so many dogs around that don't exactly look or act like strays that festival-goers keep adopting. Hmmm.

A few mates from London, mostly Aussies, rocked up as well and so then I had two groups of lovely people to party with. Every night of the festival I went in with my Aussie friends and then during the day I chilled in town, at the beach or at the camping site with my Britons. First night we played drinking games beforehand and half the group ended up tragically wasted while the others held their ground. I was in the latter group so at one point, after seeing some of LCD Soundsystem (boring) and Mika (not much better), and wandering around trying to check out the grounds solo after losing everyone, I was over it and went home. On the way home I met a guy who had lost his shoes and said he was biking across Europe - well impressed with that effort. He bought me a beer which I shortly after realised I didn't want and donated it to a newly made Liverpudlian friend who I spoke to until the sun came up (which was about 4:30am).

Second night was less exciting on the roster front, but Placebo was playing so I was pumped. Made it in there after drinking a fair bit beforehand and by the time I met up with a journalist friend, I was well and truly plastered (2 lt beers for £2 will do that to one's state of mind) - which I found quite amusing and him, frustrating because he was sober. And also jealous I guess cos I found almost everyone else more entertaining company than him. But, unlike most of the press people I ran into, I wasn't keen on spending all my time in VIP and guest areas. I was one of the people man. Salute. At one point, I "lost" the journos I was hanging with and made my way home - scoring a lift with a local on his motorbike up the final hill which I actually could not face. I would have rather slept at the bottom of it.

Third night was more productive on the line-up, with Klaxons, Royksopp, Missy Elliott, David Guetta and the Midnight Juggernauts scheduled. After dancing up a storm to the first two, I was super eager for Miss Demeanour but, as I've so often heard, she came on late, sang little, talked a lot, let her dancers have extended solos, left before the end of her slot and let her DJ end it, and even gave a spot to her next protege who I can't even remember the name of. What a crock. For all her amazing back catalogue, she sang pretty much samples of her biggest hits and I reckon the total amount of time actually spent "performing" was about 15 mins. Oh Missy, why do you let me down so? So that, along with the gathering narkiness of the crowd, started putting me in a bad mood. On top of that, my throat was killing, I could hardly speak, I had a nasty cough and one look at the Guetta crowd told me I was in no state to enter that realm. I could still hear the set at the camp anyway!

I looked forward to the final night with quiet trepidation, thinking it would be the third night in a row I'd grow tired of the festival scene. Fearing I'd finally started to grow up, I was determined to prove myself wrong and went in early with the Aussie crew to catch the final of the World Cup with energy to boot. I told myself I wouldn't drink or if I did, it wouldn't be beer. Five minutes later, pint in hand, I was in the tiny sector of Spanish supporters (a friend we were with was half Spanish) while the Dutch screamed all around us. I left at halftime to catch Pendulum and I'm so glad I did. Not only was the game a no-score until additional time, but Pendulum absolutely rocked it and put me in a stellar mood for the rest of the evening. Knowing I'd never meet the others again, I made friends with a couple of cool Aussie girls and we watched Faith No More and Chemical Brothers, then went to a chillout area before calling it a night. Success! Fun had.

I was due to wake at 10am next day, but once again the searing heat forced everyone out of their tents (those who had made it into tents, that is) and I was so sick of constantly sweating that I was showered, packed and into town by 10am. I managed to wrangle a spot on the earlier coach and was back in Budapest just four hours later. Thank god! Went to C's house, got a few things then we went to his other place, I showered and passed out in bed, woke up a few hours later then after cooking dinner for him and his friend, tried to watch a movie to no avail and went to bed, and tried to sleep in the middle-of-the-night heat. Maaaaan I'd kill for a swimming pool!!!!