(More) free massages and drug boats. In that order.

I woke up with the firm intention of doing the Rhino Safari today, despite the morning rain - and no, that's not traversing jungle tracks in a jeep in search of horned predators. Much less alarming, it's the name they give to the small dinghy/jetski with an outboard motor, that you drive solo or with a partner, and are guided for 2.5 hours around certain areas of the island, including some nice snorkelling spots.

I had been excited about this for a while, and thinking I could get it for a reasonable discount through staff contacts, I went down to Seaside in the morning to see if it was possible to book for that afternoon. I'd already done a bit of washing (now my mortal enemy) and finally got credit on my phone during grocery shopping (Polly waiting faithfully outside the supermarket doors, bless her), so I was set.

Unfortunately, the price had escalated a little and the afternoon was already full, so I shelved that idea for the moment and instead prodded the office manager for some ideas on different beaches to visit. I have to make use of every day off from now on! She suggested Baie Rouge on the French side, and N who keeps a private horse at the stables happened to be going that way, so I didn't even need to bother with buses. Hooray!

The beach was a little unusual, in that its sand was quite uneven and then literally dropped down to the water. So the water didn't come up into the pockets of lower sand, it just naturally undulated against a barrier of trees that provided shade to those choosing the back of the beach to park their butts. Nice to not have to buy an umbrella!

There were a few rastas floating around with their prying eyes, but I managed to find a spot a little further away to comfortably embrace the French side idealisms. If you get my point. Soon I met a masseuse en route around the beach and told him I couldn't afford any massages. No worries, he said, I'll give you a free sample.

Now this isn't the first time this has happened to me. I forgot to mention it in my previous blog because it happened during my drunken Tuesday off, and honestly I forgot it happened until today, but that day a lady masseuse had given me a free massage too. I gather it makes other people want one, seeing someone else getting poked n prodded into a firm state of relaxation.

I got talking with the masseuse of today, and was telling him which parts of the island I'd seen, and that I was on a mission to see more of it before I went home to my boyfriend. He offered to take me to the next beach over, where some really nice views were. And also if I wanted him to take him massage table out for a proper massage, he was happy to do it for free.

Now I know this sounds suss, but I judged the situation soberly and carefully. He had a proper table, brought out sheets and towels of all descriptions, and after he'd shown me some actually nice views, he gave me a head-to-toe (but NOT full body!) massage, being careful to keep my non-massaged body parts under towel. It was beautiful, the waves crashing behind me and the sun warming my body. Helped to fix that sore calf muscle, too.

Afterwards, he said he would do it again another time if I liked, and I said I have to be respectful to my boyfriend and going about getting massages all the time isn't really going about that the best way. Then I got into a long description about how this guy was it, he was the one, I'd waiting my whole life to find him and now I had, I didn't want to lose it. I wanted to be with him forever. In the car on the way to dropping me off in Marigot, he remarked about how sullen and reflective I'd become. Well, that's what happens when you get me thinking about my boy, I said.

I got home, had a quick snack (not the most healthy, won't even describe it) and then had to go back to Seaside to get Polly, who had been waiting there since I ran off in a car, thinking I was off working with the horses all day. I am really becoming fond of this little doggy, will be sad to say goodbye to her. There I did some more sunbaking in my "French side" bikini (ass cheeks now red!) and chatted with my workmates when the day was done. In front of a beautiful sunset, a heavily loaded boat passed.

"Ahh, must be from Puerto Rico."
"What is it?"
"Drugs."
"Really?? How do you know?"
"I just know. First box is marajuana, second is cocaine, third is ecstasy pills."

Still not sure if they were kidding or not. Seemed pretty serious to me.

Later at home, I chilled out while waiting for N to call and arrange drinks... possibly. She always has so much on the go I wasn't holding my breath. When she did call, she apologised that she had to stay home and finish off some photography work but could we reschedule for tomorrow? Sure! I have to go to work for one ride, but afterwards hopefully we'll do something. Visit the fortress perhaps? Random photo shoot? Until then, it's just me, my laptop, a biography of Bob Marley and the reverberating rhythms of ongoing church worship and the kind of preaching we usually only see in Eddie Murphy comedies. Happy Sunday, everyone!

Worst. Day. Ever.

Today was the worst day at work so far, hands down. Not only did I not get a single dollar in tips, I had to endure the most hideous of French women on a private ride that thankfully was so unbearable (for her, apparently, for me, definitely) that she cut it short.

This woman and her daughter, well for starters were French and that never lends to favourably to politeness or generosity in tips. She was complaining - in French and English - before we even got her on a horse... eww, everything is muddy, the saddle is dirty, I want an English, no I want a Western, my back hurts so we can only walk and canter not trot, I want to gallop on the beach, is this ALL the beach you have, where is the sand, there are too many rocks, my saddle is hurting me... SHUTUP!!!!!!!

The daughter was quite a good rider, much better than the mum, and seemed to enjoy herself although neither wanted to do much cantering after the first time. And when they realised our beach was not a 50 mile stretch, she made some remark about being able to have the same ride in Europe, and that she wanted it to be cut short. FINE WITH ME. I tried my hardest to make it a pleasant experience but she just tried even harder to be difficult.

We came back under an hour after leaving, although the ride was meant to be 1.5 hours. The office manager asked what happened and when I told her, she understood. Ahh, the French, she said... and she's from the French side!! Needless to say I didn't get a dime at the end of it all, even though I still gave them a new, fun experience in the water at the end, in fact she didn't even say goodbye. We called ahead to her hotel to warn that she would complain and the concierge politely said, don't worry she is a bitch that has complained about everything here so far. Good riddance.

I had another ride, two cute little girls from Caracao I could practise my Spanish with, and 2 French/Canadians who could speak a bit of English. So it was a bilingual affair! Yay. They didn't tip me either. And that was a bitch of a ride, trying to keep them all in order. None could ride and the girls really both should have been on a lead but I could only put the older one, on the horse that kept eating. Glad to see the end of that one too.

I was SO thankful when the day was over. Couldn't get out of there quick enuf. I knew I had 6 days off ahead of me, and I was eternally grateful that included New Years Day. Party ahead!! So I was ready to get a pedicure and have nice nails for 6 days of the day.

Stopped at the supermarket for some food stuffs - needed to save money before the big party for Old Years - and quickly whipped up some spag bowl before heading to the beauty salon. Turned out to be too tight with time so shoved the food into one of my empty yoghurt containers and shovelled it down as we walked up the road. Everyone must have thought we LOVED our yoghurt. And with a Corona in the other hand, what a treat we must have seemed.

After all that rushing, turned out the salon was out of power and our "white skin" would be too difficult to work on in the dark. Forgive me for thinking black skin would be somewhat harder to see in the dark, but apparently that's the truth! So we were relegated to the following morning, which really pissed me off since I knew how hectic it was going to be anyway.

So we went for some drinks to Buccaneers and La Bamba, as per usual, ensuring that any activity we had planned for the next morning was going to be that much more difficult to carry out. But then again, that's what we do best!

Escape to Pinel!

Another day off - time for Pinel Island! With the rearranging of my schedule I finally got one of the other guides off on the same day and so it was that rasta guide I took me to the French side. Well, I met him there, he lives there.

Was a minor mission getting to where the boat goes to Pinel, considering the size of the island (the best beaches here are often the hardest to get to), but I was rewarded by a lovely 2-cheek kiss from a pretty Barbadian-looking lady with big, bright flowers tucked behind her ears at the bar I wait for I at. Kinda willed the time to pass quickly as my greeting and polite courtesies in French were about all I could remember of the language so I didn't want her to try and engage in full conversation. Embarrassing!

At first I was going to change plans with I to go somewhere closer, as I was still at Seaside waiting for A to come online at 11am, but I ended up getting there just an hour later and we were on the 5 min boat ride in no time at all.

Pinel is a tiny island that opens 9-5 every day, and closes down at night. It is framed by lovely, clear water, clean sand and a few bar restaurants. At I's shout, I opted for a rum punch then pina colada then rack of ribs. Oops! Might've gone a bit overboard there. Especially since I's a vegetarian and doesn't drink! haha...

Was a beautiful day, though, marred only by the fact I forgot to change my underwear into swimmer bottoms and therefore had to make the decision about whether to go to the private side of the island to swim (and flash my ass to I) or just stay on land. I know what A is wanting me to say here, but damn the water was too tempting and so we walked the couple of minutes to the other, slightly seaweed-logged beach with no one on it, and I stripped down and jumped in.

A little drowsy after a smoke, we wandered back to the main area and had another drink (I felt daring and ordered a Bushwacker, which actually turned out to be quite nice). Got the second last boat back over - I hesitate to call it a ferry because it is so small. The guy on the way over gave us a cheaper ride too, since he realised he lived here. And no one at all asked for money for the way back so all in all, $5 return trip! Value for money.

All full of sunshine and happiness, I bounced back home and got changed for my weekly horseriding lesson. Got down to Seaside and no one had put aside my horse before letting them out for the night - no worries, he wasn't hard to find and put up no fight to being caught at 6pm. It's all a trick, you see. He doesn't become a pain until you get on him!

He took a bit to get relaxed, was bobbing his head around and chewing on his bit a lot, and rushed about in his trot and canter. Was a bit difficult trying to slow him with my seat and hands, as when I released the rein a little to get his head down, he sped up. And he still favours one side to work on, especially with half-pass etc. All boring technical stuf that he and I both still have a long way to go on. But there will be no more lessons for 2 weeks as the boss is on holidays with his family. That will be an interesting time at the ranch.

Noticed my legs have become quite brown, and it's possible I have never seen them quite so brown. Almost the colour of my arms, and they are always the darkest part of my body. So that's awesome. What's not awesome is the fact that the brownness does not extend all the way, and I have a nice tradey short mark. Gross. Maybe I will have to start riding in bikini bottoms at work. My history with bikini bottoms is not that great, though, evidently...

I'm on tomorrow solo with D, my least favourite guide. He's been given a warning and stern talking-to in front of everyone, so we're all to be on watch that he's behaving himself, being nice to guests and staff, and treating the animals right. Or he's cut back to weekends only and no horse rides. Let's see how this goes. Am not particularly looking forward to this but it's gotta be done. We have a few rides so hopefully we'll just keep out of each other's way.

A lil bit o' bitching...

Today was the slowest day I've seen so far at work. My morning ride didn't show up (what is it with these people??) so I was left filling and cleaning the water drums, a task no less menial than it is necessary. My afternoon (and only) ride was OK, 4 locals that were friends with the boss that I suspected were riding either free or on a severe discount. Needless, to say, they didn't tip a dime, scabby cunts.

They also whined a little that we were only walking - as they were "experienced" riders. Well, the girl's boyfriend couldn't trot to save his life and they should have paid for a faster tour if that's what they wanted. Oh, that's right, they didn't pay.

And they were French. Oui oui. Tight tight. So no friendly facts about St Maarten for them, then. Fun times. At least I got them going a little faster when I asked for help in chasing a rouge horse back down (even though they were useless) and even got them laughing in the water. I walked a little faster through the trail also so they could trot to catch up if they wanted - or was it to make the ride finish sooner???

The guide from Guyana got a little annoying today, several times I had to say, "Uh huh, uh huh, yeah listen I gotta go over here now and do that..." He bitches about all the things wrong about the place, and that his voice is never heard etc etc. Like I can do anything about it. Keeps asking if my days off are the same as his, like we could go island exploring or something together... I'd rather explore the island with a rabid, mutant dog. At least that way I could shoot it before it bit me.

Wow, what an angry blog this turned out to be.

Well, what good things can I say... it was a beautiful blue sky today, oh except for the afternoon rain and the searing heat. OK, let's try again.

I saw a girl in overalls. That reminded me that I used to wear overalls when I was younger. They were hideous then and they're hideous now. Just a quiet observation.

Got a message last night from my co-worker, J, asking if I didn't talk to him much cos I was angry at him. Sounded more like a sulky boyfriend to me, so I didn't reply. I am not getting into that kind of friendship here.

One night this week we are trying to do a movie night with the staff. The 3 Musketeers. Maybe it's for inspiration??

Now I'm at a wifi cafe begrudgingly, hoping to have had free internet all night with my boss' plug-in dongle thing but for some reason it doesn't work with my computer. Ho hum. So I've downed a beer, cooked some spag bowl and hot-footed it up the road for another internet adventure.

Shittest work day ever

Today was the shittest day I have had at work. Bar none. Shit went down with some overpriced sunscreen ($68 pesos, seriously that is like 12 pounds!) and I got the shit for it... then they were watching me like hawks. Seriously bullshit and I am COUNTING the days til I leave. No amount of glorious sunshine is gonna fix my mood. Also didn`t get a camera as promised cos the price wasn`t the same. Hopefully will get to Paraguay on Friday...

One good thing that happened, however, is that I managed to get a free total adventure tour tomorrow at Iguazi falls, usually probably USD$100 or something, who knows. Anyway, so there is some benefit to working here besides not feeling like a useless prat.

Blah!

Anyway, must run, vino to be drunk and cute French boys to seduce (otra vez)...

Iguazu`s new dancing queen??

Just a quickie... the French hottie that works here said he thinks I may be able to get a job dancing for Cuba Libre (the biggest club in town), so we are going to ask next time we go. That would be super sweet, a bit of extra cash, some good exercise and muscle building, and of course fame and fortune... my ultimate desire haha...

Where`s my beer???

Tragedy at Iguazu Falls

Some bad news hit our desks yesterday that turned the mood a little somber. Reports surfaced that one of the speedboats - the same one I had ridden in just a few days earlier - had gotten too close to the waterfalls and gotten sucked in after hitting some rocks, capsizing and throwing all its passengers out in the process. Two people were killed and several more were missing... updates now tell me the others were all found alive but injured.

I must admit, when I was on the boat I wasn`t scared at all, but when I think about it, the water is so powerful and we get so close to the actual falls that it is entirely possible something like this could happen. No amount of driving experience could match the force of that river.

We aren´t sure if the victims were staying at this hostel - entirely possible - but until we know, I am trying not to think about it. So so sad.

Other than that, yesterday included a pretty hideous start to the day after just 3 hours sleep. I had stumbled in to my room at the staff house, the first time I had been there the same time as my roomie, and the poor darling had to wake up and set his alarm for me to wake up as I had left mine in the hostel.

After work, I sat by the pool and tried to sleep before surrendering to the insects crawling through the grass, and bailing to the guys´ staff dorm at the hostel. Then dinner and drinks with the staff were organising and we headed to my house. Was so glad we were there this time instead of the hostel so I could just fall asleep afterwards... and oh, how I needed the sleep. Soooooooooooo tired.

Just a side note on the staff here. So funny... they are all local except for me, a British guy working here until he gets a new passport (his was nicked in Buenos Aires) and a French guy who is quite hot but soooo French. Freely admits he doesn`t like speaking English or really anyone who does... haha... but he is a nice guy really, cocky and self-assured but a good guy. The others speak varying degrees of English but mostly speak in Spanish which is good, as I am learning more every day. Yay!

Today is my day off so I used the opportunity to go to the 3 Frontiers, basically just a bus stop near the edge of the river that has 3 pillars for Argentina, Brazil and Paraguay. Cool thing to see but not much else. I went there with a couple of American guys from the hostel - one which had done pretty much the same route as me since Eastern Europe last year!! - then got a local SIM card and back to the hostel for some down time.