Awkward and amusing times in Eastern Europe

Whoever thought I'd never have use for my limited Romanian language skills can eat their bilingual words, motherfucker! Well, actually, that would include myself too but anyway... I could not stop laughing at what happened last night.

Arriving at Nyugati train station, I first had to shake a random but sweet Hungarian guy who asked if I needed any help. Although I know he was just trying to be friendly, he made things a little awkward when he said 'oh Sydney... I knew a girl from Sydney. But she died.' Hmm... what do you say to that??

Anyway, afterwards I was directed to the pub I always meet my English teaching friend at in Budapest, and went to ask a cute boy and his friend sitting on the steps which way to go... after hearing him say 'no inteleg' ('don't understand' in Romanian), I said 'ah ha! you're Romanian!' and proceeded to ask him how to get there in Romanian. There were slightly miffed as to why an English-speaking person knew any Romanian, and even more miffed as to which direction I was after, so I just laughed my ass off and found directions from someone other local. Seriously, who would've thought I'd EVER need that random skill again??! Too funny.

So then I met my friend E at the pub, had a couple of beers (sweet, sweet beer) and headed back to his for a few more and a smoke that put me on my ass. I was tired from all the traveling and fell asleep before my head hit the pillow. What a day.

Muffin top mamas and Hungarian ho's

Next stop: Budapest. With my (still 20kg) backpack on my back, I boarded the train to Forli via Ancona and sat looking around at the chavvy women staring at me, my hair, my probably general unkeptness as their tacky bling rings caught the sunshine and their muffin tops spilled over their super tight jeans. Good call senoritas.

Anyway, 5 hours later I was finally at Forli airport, the destination I'd come to as a result of cheap ticket searching. In total, the train, plane and bus transfer journey cost me about 70 euros. To get from Italy to Budapest. Pretty good!

There was a super tall blonde woman on my flight to Budapest, who all the men were staring at. She was all fake though - fingernails, hair, tan - and when I stared for a moment too long at her tight white t-shirt I realised even her boobs were fake. I struggled to make myself think she didn't want the attention, she just looked like that and was probably sick of people staring at her. Then I saw the see-through t-shirt with no bra. She went from poor little stared-at girl to attention-seeking stripper. Split second.

When you realise your stallion is actually just dog meat

My diversion to Budapest has so far yielded less than desirable results. Not only have I not been treated to the special cuddles I was so looking forward to, but I have almost been assaulted by said man's friend.

Let me start from the beginning. After getting some sleep and managing to withdraw money, I spent pretty much the whole day on the internet doing bits n pieces I hadn't had a chance to over the past couple of weeks. Having been cooped in the house the whole day and getting only glimpses of my friend as he went from errand to errand, I eventually decided to get some wine for us (he agreed to drinking it last that night with me) and of course the 5 minutes I chose to go to the shops was the exact time he came back to the house. Not getting in, he went elsewhere.

So I'm getting more and more bored as I drink myself to oblivion, saved only by his mate that comes round to get something and stays for a chat. Eventually, he gets home, completely stoned off his nut, hardly even notices I'm there, so I stuck around for a little bit then bailed to bed. What was the point in staying up??

I am awoken at some ghastly hour of the morning by not my mate, but his FRIEND climbing into bed with me. Once I realise it's not in fact my mate, I jump out of bed, all dazed n confused n fuzzy from the grog, and yell and scream at him until he finally gets the picture and leaves. I notice he takes the keys with him, to deliver back to C, so I wonder if this was all pre-arranged or a sneaky act on his friend's behalf.

Finally C gets home ("I do have a gf you know" - what a charmer), I try to explain what happened and his first reaction? I'm pretty sure you were flirting with him and gave him that impression. Thanks. No, really, thanks for your support. I said it was neither here nor there whether I was (innocently) flirting with his mate - most likely to try and get some kind of response from his stoned ass in the corner - more the fact that his mate had such low moral standing to try it on with a girl he knew had come to Budapest just to see his friend. Tired of arguing with a brick wall, I fell asleep.

Another little treat came in the morning, when at some stage I was roused by C's hand pushing my head towards his crutch. Now I'm not entirely sure what school of ho he thinks I attended at some point in my life, but this is not cool. Especially when my refusal to perform such acts is met with a swift turn of the back and continued sleeping. Way to make me feel loved. And about 16 years old again. It's like he channeled all those fuckwits I hung with during high school that made me hate men for so long. Good work though, it was quite a stunningly accurate portrayal.

I've now checked myself into a hostel for the last 2 nights of my stay here. I have no intention to be put in that situation again and also no desire to see his friend ever again. Particularly when I am certain they'll be on the same team about the whole thing.

It's so disappointing that this guy, who was so lovely and generous last time we met, and who had expressed a specific desire to see and hang out with me this time around, ended up being this way. Oh well, I'm just so glad I'm outta there - the knot in my stomach is starting to unwind finally...

Read the warning: sleeping pills cause stupidity

I write this from the cosy little apartment I'm staying at in Budapest, having had a hectic last 24 hours getting here. Having been ferried from Reghin to Targu Mures for a bus trip that would take 12 hours to get to Budapest, I settled into the backseat (momentarily squashy due to a lady who found the fact I knew a few Romanian words fascinating) and popped a couple of sleeping pills. The next few hours were a blur, as I rocked in and out of consciousness and somehow negotiated toilet stops throughout.

Once at Budapest, at 4am I was faced with then negotiating a bus station I had never been at, hardly anyone speaking English, no stations open to even get money out and no idea which direction to get a tram, should I find one running. I found some young Hungarian girls that spoke good English but had little more suggestions other than wait, meanwhile my mate's on the phone saying he needs to get up soon to do something so I am being pushed to get to his sooner than later.

He orders a cab to the station cos that's cheaper apparently, while I searched for a cash machine. Once located, I in my groggy sleeping pill state, stared blankly at the screen asking for my PIN number. Blindly fumbling onto some keys, I managed to get it wrong twice and at least recognise that another attempt might lose my card forever. So I had to think fast (not an easy task for me at this time) and ended up getting public transport (tram, metro then walking) and making it to the flat before he left. My back was killing me from my hectic backpack but in hindsight, I did save money from getting a cab!

Got to C's place about 5:30am, the second time I've arrived at such an hour (poor thing) and he left shortly after. I had a good few more hours of sleep then woke with a sudden flash of non-sleep deprived intelligence, and rushed to the bank to try my 'PIN'. Seems I was onto a good thing and now I'm flushed with cash - yay! Now I have today to try and sort out some shit on the computer and chill out before the Swedish girls arrive on Friday for a night of my fabulous tours :)

An apartment to myself in Budapest? Don't mind if I do!!

After the hectic mission to get to Budapest, I was absolutely spent and slept in late the next day. Actually, I've been here 3 days and I've done that continuously so maybe I'm just a lazy mo fo :)

To be fair, yesterday was my bday and I was up doing various things until almost 6am. So give me a break. It was an interesting bday actually... I woke up next to a rather fine specimen (don't mind if I do) so I already had a smile on my face. Then we went to his mate's house who apparently just cooks for him cos he's useless, had a feed, smoke, drink then went on our merry way.

Well, that merriment soon faded as I trekked around the city behind the big man as he did little errands and my dreams of getting to the river slipped from my hands. I got grumpy and a little sad from missing my family and friends on my bday so (after apologising which apparently he just DOES NOT DO so I should be thankful????) he took me to the water and dropped me somewhere I'd probably enjoy myself. Won't see him again til Sunday morning but I got the keys to his apartment so I'm not too upset really ;)

Took me all over 5 mins to find new friends - an American guy and Canadian girl - who were nice, the American was (unsurprisingly) a little irritating and always trying to debate every point we made, particularly on his views on bigotry and sexism. Back the truck up mate. Anyway, we wandered around the island (place in between Buda and Pest with a few clubs that weren't really kicking into gear yet), and then headed towards a strobe light in the middle of town. Turns out it was a really bad dance club filled with over 40s going mental to it. Hilarious but also a little scary.

Then I met up with a new Couchsurfing friends who is actually Hungarian and knows some cool bars, so we walked (luckily towards my place) and found Simpla this really cool bar made out of a building that was bombed so it had no roof in the middle and an open drinking area. Tried to get photos but my camera is shit. End of story. Made friends with some Swedish guys, one of which was a bit sweet on me I think but nada. Not interested. But yeah, B walked me home and I entertained myself in my little flat (seriously, who would've thought I'd be flitting around my own apartment in Budapest a couple of months ago in London???) before collapsing for a mega sleep-in. Ahhh yeah...

Now off to explore the park and get some FOOD. Man, I'm hungry. And I should get dressed.