Random hotels and not-so-random bruises

Another night at Cuba Libre, another wake-up in a random hotel room. Another set of pole bruises. Oh yeah, I didn´t mention did I... those bruises I got on my arm mysteriously... well, I worked out they were from the pole at CL. And last night I caned myself, seriously it HURT! And when I woke up I looked at my arm... sheeesh. Worst ever.

But at least I had fun.

Yesterday at work was the worst day ever. They told me I could no longer handle the money because there were problems with the till the day before... and "they don´t know" whose fault it is, but I am pretty sure they think it´s mine. And rightly so, I am shit. I swear every time someone is watching me work, I cock up.

Worse still, I went to work SO STONED yesterday I could not stop laughing. I made so many mistakes ("Pepsi please...no I said Pepsi, not 7up") and am pretty sure I was in general just shit at life. When I sobered up, though, I made sure I worked extra hard just to make up for my shitness. I do so hate feeling useless! :)

So I didn´t think I was gonna pull last night, or even go out, but as I was preparing to run out the door to CL I got talking to a cute Argentinian guy.... anyway, he was at the club too and pulling a very pretty English girl from the hostel - while also trying to pull me. Hilarious, given the girl was doing the same thing and then we got chatting and ended up making out in front of him. Haha... priceless..

So I was wasted - clearly - and not sure how I got back to his (private - woot woot!!) room at another hostel but when I woke up I was sure I was in a private room at Hostel Inn. Super confused when I looked out the window. Anyway, must run... work time. Woot.

Kickstarting the party

Forgot to add that yesterday I woke up without a phone so I just dressed and walked to work, not knowing if it was 10am or 3pm... starting work at 2pm, I was hoping it was the former. Finally got there and was told it was 11am, 3 hours to waste before work. So I sat by the pool, ended up falling asleep and getting a nasty-ass burn mark on ye tatas (outside el bikini) and starting work all dazed n confused. At least I caught the last few rays of sunshine before the clouds stormed in...

So. Today. Or last night, should I say... All I will say is that I deserve a frequent flyers card for that friggin 2-hour room hotel. Best customer ever. Haha... ahh estoy una zorro.

Anyway, so I had spotted these guys come in who were clearly a bit older than the early/-barely-twenty crowd I had come accustomed to here, and one was pretty fine. He glanced at me a moment longer than necessary and I pretty much knew then n there I was in. I asked the day before and they weren´t gonna check in til the next day so that was fine.

The next day, yesterday, I finished work, convinced some guests to oome to Cuba Libre (who actually ended up bailing before I found some others) and soon after got talking to these guys. Turns out they are plastic surgeons on a conference (hence the matching white linen shirts) - don´t even ask me why they were staying at a hostel, no matter how resorty it is.

They all came to the club with me and J, we looked super cool getting all 12 of them in for free cos we worked at Hostel Inn, and then inside us 2 even got free drinks. Woot woot!! In the club, I was in... had a good dance and at some point found myself in the VIP area which is muy similar to the normal area but just looking down on the others. Cool. Ahem.

I saw an empty podium that was being used as a drink stand (blasphemy!!) so I jumped up and after my short stint, I had convinced the rest of the club to keep utilising the area and soon enuf there were people after people clambering up there, of varying degrees of ability. Still, my efforts got a couple of kisses with some hot Argo chicks so I ain´t complaining...

I left with hot Argo who had hired a car and suddenly I found myself driving into familiar territory, at the hotel offering 2-hour rooms and ultimate privacy. Was a fun night but god knows how I get these bruises on my arms...

Ridin´ with the (drunk) po-po

When I realised my previous hook-up from the hostel was most likely getting it on with another worker here (don´t blame him, she is tidy), while I was waiting in the TV room trying to sleep, I gave up and walked out to make the trek home by myself at 5:30am. Boo. But surprise, surprise I was joined by the hostel girl who mysteriously appeared from the dark when I walked out, and came home too.

Walking home, I refrained from making any reference to how long she´d spent in the "toilet", choosing instead to not care and just enjoy the beautiful lightening firing up the sky in the early hours of the morning. C`est la vie, or whatever.

Now that it was Friday, I was pumped to go out again. Friday nights seem to be the biggies here, so after the initial afternoon wall-hitting, I was ready to roll. A few drinks here and we managed to get 4 taxis worth of guests and workers into the centre to go to Cuba Libre. Another random night to be had...

In the club, I did some more podium dancing but mostly danced on the floor, really feeling like picking up a girl but instead ending up with a feminine-looking Argentinian cutie that could really dance. TURN ON. After a while I was just wanting to leave to his house, as the amount of sweat I`d exuded was actually becoming ridiculous, but he kept babbling some reason why we couldn´t. Do you have a girlfriend? No. Do you live with your parents? No. Then what´s the fucking issue?? Damn my shitty Spanish.

I pulled J, the English guy who works here with me and who has been here for several months, over to ask him what was wrong, and I found out he didn´t have a girlfriend, he had TWO. I am out.

After that, the club lost a large amount of its already dwindling appeal and I convinced J to leave. The tourists had largely left and it was just horny locals I was sick of trying to run away from.

What happened next was definitely one of the most random things to happen in this crazy border town yet. A carful of cops said they would give me a ride home in their cop truck so I jumped in, careful not to sit in the middle as they asked, and found myself accepting a sip of their cocktail as they passed it around. So many things wrong with this picture I can´t even begin.

They stopped at the police station just down from my house, clearly wanting me to stick around, but I bailed quickly and walked home, palming them off when they drove after me and asked me back. Weirdos. It was around this point I realised I had to paid one cent the whole night since the club. No entry (cos I work here), no drinks (cos guys bought me some after I danced on the podium) and no taxi home. Boom.

The next morning I woke with the thought, "but why???" running through my head. Seriously. Why would I think the cop car is the safest to go home in?? If they did something to me, who would I have turned to? Fucking idiot. Don`t try this at home, kids.

Beach beauties

The next day... I wake up with my standard where-the-fuck-am-I moment before turning my head to see the beautiful Argentinian with his arm wrapped around me. Ahh, yes. That`s where I am.

We could hear M still snoring his head off in the next room so we got ourselves ready for some beach action... well, L put on his boardshorts and that was basically it. He forgot everything else... no camera, no sunscreen, no sunglasses, just a wallet. But I suppose that`s the most important part. Especially if he`s gonna be a gentleman and pay for me all day. Aww..

I scooted back a la casa to grab my Brazilian bikini and we headed to Ipanema beach. I tell you, it is much more satisfying going to the beach with a hottie on your arm... And applying sunscreen is so much more enjoyable. We got an umbrella and sat under it for hours. I had a little swim, well I waded into the knee-deep water, too afraid to go any further because of the strong waves. That bikini ain`t built for deep impact.

I am starting to feel more comfortable in the tiny piece of material that is my new bikini. And it really is an experience to be surrounded by women with so much comfort and confidence in their figures. Young and old, they strut around in Brazilian bikinis and damn, they are sexy!! A welcome change to the skinny-obsessed conscience of Australia. I embrace it.

But eventually, we tired of the sun and sand, and parted ways on the train with plans to meet up again that night. Well, that never happened. And, with the benefit of hindsight, I believe he is trying to make the most of his holiday. So good on him. Randy little fucker ;)

I spoke to hot Argentinian briefly online and he promised to call me to go out... which he didn`t. Oh well. Then his host M, a gay guy I LOVE partying with, also promised to call me. And didn`t. Not feeling the love tonight!! So I just called it a night, chilled at F`s house and I guess saved some money! haha

The Other Twin.

Today I felt the first burst of bad energy from my CS host in Rio. Not long after waking up, he finally dragged himself away from his god-loved computer games to go to the kitchen, at which point I ran over to check my emails for 30 seconds. Moments later, I hear a banging and crashing in the kitchen and I am wondering what the hell is going on. He comes screaming and ranting into the bedroom saying I didnt know how to wash up properly and he was sick of it blah blah blah... Now I can safely say I have NEVER known anyone to be so precious about washing of dishes but hell, I was trying to do it right!!

Needless to say, mid-rant he booted me off the internet - which I desperately needed to organise my next travels - and so I scooted out of the house to do some sightseeing. But first treated myself to a pedicure - cheapest ever!! - and now I have funky pearl purple nails. Mmmm tasty. For something to do, I chose the botanical gardens (Jardim Bontancao or something), and again planned to meet some other CSers but they never showed for some reason. Probably could have been useful to just bite the bullet and buy a SIM card when I first got here but hey.

The gardens were BEAUTIFUL. I took the best pics I could on my shitty camera phone, even bumped into an Austraaaaaaaaaaaaaayan from Ceeeeeeirns (Cairns for those not in the know), but for some reason I just felt weird the whole time. Really lethargic and kinda light-headed. I put it down to post-sunstroke from yesterday. Oh, did I mention I had a sunburn mark from my iPod cord right down the middle of my stomach? Yeah. Hot.

So I abandoned ship and went back to the apartment, kinda dreading what mood I would encounter when I got there. By this stage I just wanted OUT of that place. Grrr. But anyway, I hung around because there was a little time before the weekly CS meeting where I met a bunch of people the week before. And I needed a sleep to try and get my head back together.

Was kinda relieved when my host said he wasnt coming to the CS party, and I set out alone to catch up with some newly made friends. Finally found the place after walking what felt like a million miles along Copacabana beach, and ran immediately into some Aussie girls. They were nice, we had a chat until I saw HIM. The hot Argentinian. Correction. His hotter identical twin brother. Hotter because, once I started talking to him, he actually had a personality. Boom. If round 1 didnt work then I am definitely trying for round 2.

More touchy-feely than his brother, and this was a good sign, I soon got him down onto the beach mid-downpour for a quick ankle-deep wade into the water...which before long turned into an all-out, underwear affair jumping under the waves and laughing hysterically while simultaneously making out and trying to breathe underwater.

Let me clarify this for you. I am on Copacabana beach. Swimming almost naked at midnight with a HOT Argentinian boy. He pulls his lips from mine to say - in Spanish, of course - do you know that you are beautiful? - I almost melted in his arms. Dear God I could have died right then and died happy.

Anyway, so fast forward a couple of hours and I am back at the place this guy is staying. Of course we had to have a shower to clean ourselves of the sand and salt... but we wont go into that. All I can say is this guy is one of the most beautiful (to me, at least) guys I have seen in Brazil and after failing with his twin the week before (which is a good thing now I know the good twin!!), I am SO happy to have scored this coup. Mmm... so tasty.

Needless to say, my recent interactions with Argentinian boys have changed my plans to head there post-haste. I have 2 hostels in Cordoba (funnily enuf the same town the aforementioned gorgeous boy lives in) that have said I am welcome to come work there, and so I have emailed the better one to see if the offer is still there. Hopefully I will hear back with a yes!

But first I will break up the trip by visiting Foz do Iguaçu, which apparently has some amazing waterfalls you can do a boat trip through. Probably over my budget but I think I will stretch it just for this time. Hopefully I wont be spending much at the hostel so it will balance out. Hopefully...