Ride 'em camels!!!

When I woke yesterday, I did not think that by the afternoon, L and I would be perched on the two biggest camels at the farm, riding them all on our ownsies through the deer park. Nor did I think we'd finish the long day a little drunk after several bottles of wine at J's house for a belated bday celebration for W. But, as so often happens here, it turned into a wonderfully random day enjoyed by all :)

Having started the day extra early (urgh) to make the English class G wanted us to come along to, and having had a shitty sleep from a certain someone's alarm clock going off constantly from 3:20am for some reason... I was in no mood to be ticked off. G unfortunately decided today was the day to trick me into thinking she'd accidentally tucked into the cake we laboured over yesterday for J and W, and I stormed off in a gust of frustration, putting that extra bit of force into each pile of horse poo I shovelled... Only at breakfast did we check the cake to see it untouched - G said, "I was joking haha!" Not funny.

Things got a little better after that, jumping into the car to head to M's house for the English get-together. We had pastries, tea and cake (already things were looking up) then some sparkling wine. Boom. M's house was gorgeous and her two dogs were so cute. I miss dogs.

Afterwards, we went to E's house for another tantalising tour of the tastebuds, this time her homemade spag bowl, and of course the inevitable dessert (she whipped out the profiteroles again, knowing how much we loved them last time... choc sauce poured over, whipped cream... just divine) and more sparkling wine. G had joined us again by this point, and swiftly took us back to the farm after it all.

I was hoping we were going to ride a camel today because she'd moved the special stairs out the day before, but I didn't want to expect too much. It was only when she asked us to get in just 1 horse from the paddock that I knew we weren't riding horses today... And we could not stop the smiles stretching to the corners of our faces.

I warned L that it would probably be just a leading expedition, with G up front, but nevertheless we were excited just to be going out into the forest on the camels. I guessed at Halif (the safest one) and Sky (old and reliable) being our steeds for the day - slightly off target with Sky, instead G asks me to put a halter on Mustafa, the biggest one and also the one I'd recently had an alpha battle with (former stallion, y'see). I crossed my fingers hoping I'd be on him.

I got my wish, and soon enuf we were slung over the camels, reins in one hand, whip in the other, and looking down to the ground about 2m below. Strangely, I was not one ounce scared - probably just too excited - and just wanted to get moving!! We went through the deer park, led at first, then got the go-ahead to go solo - and we went wild, hollering, whipping, kicking... in the end, G had to tell us to be quiet! haha... good times.

I have to say, although it's comfy being nestled in between the humps on what is more like a woolly mammoth than anything else, it does get tiresome digging your heels into a giant teddy bear that really does not want to move. Sometimes I forgot I was on a camel at all, and at one point G asked if I was suicidal because I was just about to wander down the path unaided by her, that the camels usually run down. I didn't know!

Still on our high, we ended the ride and thought that was it for the day but no, we saddled up some more horses, I jumped on my fave, Creo (which I now know means "I believe" in Spanish - cute), and we went out again into the forest. Horses are so easy to ride after camels!!

Mucking out the stables afterwards, I was called by J who asked when she would come over to pick us up. Having kinda forgotten about our arrangements, I stuttered and said, uh 7pm (45 mins away). I waited a little to tell L then casually said, "J is coming in half an hour". "Half an hour??!" she said arm-deep in camel poo balls. haha... I'm so cruel.

J came, G asked to meet her, I felt like I was introducing my new boyfriend to my parents, then we left giggling like school girls for the next village. G had warned us on our way out "don't get drunk" (yes mum), but we laughed it off... a few hours and bottles of wine and beer later, and I guess she was more right than we knew. Haha... mid-week piss-ups rock.

Winter... or was that spring??

The weather has taken a freakishly springlike turn these last few days, culminating in today's almost complete melting of the snow around these parts and near-flooding of the local stretch of the Danube (the river that runs through several European countries).

The waters are apparently now receding so no towns will have to be evacuated or anything but the other days they did have to close a few areas and divert traffic. I like to think it's just Australia saying hi.

G and I took an outing to the next biggest town, St Pölten, to see about getting my fucked digital camera fixed (result: no) and grab a few other things. We drove via an old 12th Century castle ruin on the way back, and I jumped out and took some snaps - firstly, on my brother's camera that ran out of battery then on my shitty broken one that has no flash and no screen display. So I am interested to see what I actually took photos of.

I almost fell asleep in the car on the way back but still said yes when she asked if I was still keen to ride. And it's a good thing I did, because for the first time the weather allowed us to leave the paddock and venture into the back forest.

This farm actually has a massive piece of the forest attached to the back of it - it goes a couple of generations back and has for the whole time housed a menagery of animals (although I'm pretty sure the camels are an addition from this generation!). The elastics factory was G's dad's and she's continued it - some of the people have worked here their whole lives. Can you imagine??!

Another girl came to ride with me, and we took the young horses. I, on Barack, of course got bucked again but was all good. G just keeps getting me to ride him so I must be doing something right. I hear he's from a zoo so maybe that's why he's a bit mental. And why I suit him.

When we'd unsaddled and done all the nightly animal duties, another girl arrived keen to ride so we saddled up another 2 horses and went back out as darkness closed in. Lucky my horse and the girls knew where they were going cos I had no idea. This time I rode Hafi, the other Haflinger that isn't Barack (and nowhere near as pretty).

G has lent me her wrist support bandages, so now it's a little easier to do the hard work but today I had help again so it's not so bad. I will keep wearing them riding and working, and hopefully I won't do any permanent damage to them. Damn my old cranky joints!

I have had to change heavy jackets because the one I was wearing now smells like tramp. Gross.

The cold scares me

Today I got another disappointing email from the person I´d organised a lift to Munich with, saying because I hadn´t SMSed her yesterday she gave my spot away. Great. I wasn´t aware I had to SMS, just email, which I did... but anyway. I was PISSED OFF that someone got the message so wrong, but then L and I went riding in the forest and that cleared my head a little.

The forest ride, all 2 hours of it, was beautiful because the sun kept peeking out from the clouds and making the snow sparkle and glisten. It was a little hectic for me, however, because I chose the thinnest gloves possible (me being the Aussie that refuses to believe the world ever gets cold enuf for super thick gloves) and even the 2 thick pairs of socks didn´t stop my feet from also freezing.

So while I was enjoying my time in the great snowy outdoors, I was also quietly wondering just how long it would be to get home. There is only so much my poor little sun-loving body can take. And extreme cold like this (about -7) scares me. True story.

We were going to go toboggening today but it didn´t happen so I´m glad I at least got a ride in. And now I am fine with the lift falling through because it will probably mean now I can spend a night checking out Hamburg and its sex district haha. Maybe that´s where I should look for a wedding present for T and M... ;)

Just realised... I´ve been detoxing!!

It´s been almost the full 10 days I´m staying at this host´s house in Slovenia and I realise I´ve unintentionally been detoxing from alcohol. Arrgghh!!! Scary times. But it´s just because my hosts don´t drink and I haven´t been out to a pub or in fact outside the perimeter of this village (100 inhabitants), and now I´m scalin' the walls. Scalin' man. Lucky dad is coming tomorrow and he will buy me beer. Sweet, delicious beer. Or wine. Not fussy.

In other news, I am much more relaxed now the host couple has left for Munich. We´re still doing the work that needs to be done, but I feel much happier now I don´t have eyes watching and judging how I interact with their pets. I am good with animals, why do I feel like I suck now??! Breathe. Just keep calm.

What else? Took Spooky for a nice trek through the Slovenian forest today, about time too cos I´ve been eyeing that mother up since I got here. Just beautiful.

Oh yes, and in my super relaxed state I have gotten back into tacky US drama like Grey's Anatomy, NCIS, Ugly Betty and House. And god it feels good. But not as good a nice, cold beer.

The retarded homing pigeon

OK, so I will explain what happened on my first official trail ride with a paying customer. This woman, W, is holidaying next door at her friend's holiday house and came by to look at the horses one day. She asked for me at the door, which was weird because we'd never met but I talked to her anyway. H wondered why I was being so nice when they were horrible, loud neighbours - the next day she asked to be taken on a trail and I earnt some money for H's business. That's why I'm nice to people like that.

Turns out she's actually a nice lady and was really excited about riding a horse for pretty much the first time in her life. She was on Bobby, reliable little tucker who was bought off a man that used him for his cart all his life so he's not too goey.

Things started out well, I was planning on doing a loop around from one end of the forest, behind the house and back out the other end - didn't quite work out that way. The two-hour mark came and went, and I was getting more and more hopelessly lost. I tried to cover it up but when I thought it seemed ridiculously stupid to pretend it wasn't more than two hours, I admitted we had missed the turn-off (what turn-off? I didn't know where I began, turned left or turned right dammit). The girls had stayed at home because the rest of the horses were turned out to the paddock already. They'd joked I would be lost.

When I was about to cry from frustration, I powered on to the end of a track which led out of the forest. The lady was nice enough to say she was still enjoying herself, while the horses were going mental from all the flies and mozzies around them. I don't blame them! So I looked over and saw a village, said we would head there to ask someone directions and get home as soon as we could.

As we neared the village, I was starting to recognise things but not letting myself believe I'd actually somehow made it back to my own village. Turns out I had. Like a retarded homing pigeon, I'd gotten myself hopelessly lost then somehow squawked my way back to square one. Fantastic. I wish I'd just kept my mouth shut the whole time and pretended I was nice enuf to give her a ride twice as long as she'd paid.

Oh well. I'm pretty sure I scared her off riding for the next few years. Perhaps forever. We all have our purpose in life. Maybe that's mine.

PS. I dreamt last night that I was going to marry Lady GaGa in a threesome situation with another man (and no, GaGa wasn't the man). Then the man ran off and I was left to be in a terrific lesbian love affair with her. As I woke, she was just deciding she was over being a lesbian. A bitch, even in my dreams.